The Kids and Their Fancy Future-Phones
So, I’m reading this… “article,” they call it. More like a prophecy of impending digital doom, if you ask me. Apple, bless their perpetually innovating hearts (and my perpetually aching back), is apparently cooking up four new chipsets in 2026. Four! And they’re going to be 2 nanometers. Two! Do these young whippersnappers even know what a nanometer is? Probably just think it’s some fancy new Starbucks drink size.
Back in my day, we were pushing electrons through wires you could actually see. You could almost smell the silicon, the ozone. Now it’s all invisible, like the common sense in most of these tech company boardrooms. They’re talking about “advanced packaging technology.” What does that even mean? Is it like a really sturdy box? Or do they mean they’re shrink-wrapping the damn things with unobtanium?
The iPhone 18 and the End of Simplicity
They’re talking about the iPhone 18. Eighteen! I remember when the biggest decision you made about your phone was whether it had a retractable antenna or not. Now, it’s probably whether your neural interface chip is compatible with your self-driving toaster. The article says these chips are for the “iPhone 18 fa…”. “Fa” what? “Fabulous”? “Fatally flawed”? Probably both.
And Apple’s apparently hogging nearly half of the initial production capacity. Of course, they are. They probably have a secret bunker filled with gold-plated iPhones and a direct line to every manufacturing plant on Earth. They want to make sure every single one of you is carrying a tiny, glowing supercomputer that knows more about you than your own mother. And probably reports it all to some algorithm named “Big Brother 2.0.”
Obsolescence by Design, My Friends
It’s not just the iPhone 18, mind you. These 2nm marvels are for “other products too.” What other products? Your smart toothbrush? Your internet-connected cat flap? We’re hurtling towards a future where everything has a chip, everything is connected, and everything is constantly listening. And for what? So you can order more artisanal beard oil with a voice command?
This relentless march towards smaller and smaller means faster and faster. But faster to what? Faster to a world where we’re all just data points in a giant, corporate spreadsheet? Faster to a society so reliant on these tiny, inscrutable black boxes that when one little 2nm chip hiccups, the entire global infrastructure grinds to a halt? Mark my words, it’s a house of cards, built on nanometers and wishful thinking.
The Good Old Days (Before All This Nonsense)
I just want a simple machine that does what I tell it to do, when I tell it to do it, without trying to anticipate my needs or “personalize my experience.” I don’t want my experience personalized by a machine. I want to have an experience, thank you very much. An experience where I don’t feel like I’m constantly being monitored by a chip that’s smaller than a speck of dust.
They can keep their 2nm marvels and their advanced packaging. Give me a good old command line, a sturdy keyboard, and a green screen, and I’ll show you what real computing looks like. This whole “future” thing is just an elaborate way to sell you something you don’t need, packed into a box you can’t open, running software you can’t understand. And they call that progress. Hmph. Progress towards what? Utter, complete, technological dependence? I’ve seen this movie before, and it doesn’t end well for the humans.